When Elissa had a miscarriage, she found the term ‘survivor’ showed up in her search for common ground and stories among other woman. This included Ashley William at the Human Development Project who promoted the idea of normalising miscarriage.
I will sidetrack here, to give some context. Elissa read William personable struggles with miscarriage. William’s sadness and frustration over her own miscarriage is eclipsed by the sadness and frustration she feels over how rarely women talk about their miscarriages.
“If 25 percent of my peers are currently experiencing miscarriages right alongside me, why wasn’t I prepared? Why don’t we talk about it? Why was I feeling embarrassed, broken, like a walking wound?” William writes.
Whilst reading William’s story, Elissa maintained enthusiasm throughout nearly the entire essay, until she neared the end and came upon this phrase: “I’m a survivor. Healed, I will try again.”
I think Elissa has a very strong valid point. Elissa goes on to explains that separating the word ‘survivor’ and ‘miscarriage’ would help normalise miscarriage. She said:
I understand the instinct to frame women who have had miscarriages as survivors; it’s a way to find meaning, even redemption, in chaos. Still, it’s wrong, in both logical and emotional terms.
When we call someone a survivor we are emphasizing the unacceptability, or unnaturalness, of the situation they were forced to endure. We don’t survive what is normal, we survive what is exceptional or repugnant. If the goal is to make miscarriage feel normal, then the survivor label is counterproductive. – Elissa Strauss
This is a rare one of a kind perspective! Perhaps little tweeks and adjustments in the language we use when talking about issues related to childlessness could possibly improve social consciousness on the issue – make miscarriage and childlessness by choice or circumstance less taboo.
https://hdp.press/i-need-to-talk-about-my-miscarriage-4af9d942c20f#.9l7jzlh0p
https://www.tommys.org/our-organisation/why-we-exist/miscarriage-statistics
myBabyWatch 
Miscarriage for women can be a very sad thing. We need to support women who are suffering their down times. Sometimes, it is better to tell others about the issue. Miscarriage cannot be a taboo.
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